A little over a year ago, my grandmother and my mother opened a store together in an industrial area of Bay Shore. Before the opening of the store, it was going to be a custom skirt manufacturer for Christian women, which would be run by my grandmother and it was also going to be a headquarters for my mother's drapery business. We opened the store with racks of fashionable skirts that my grandmother designed and books of examples of my mother's upholstery jobs. Slowly the store has become highly disorganized and incredibly messy. We have collected many random items and have put them for sale in the front section of our store. The middle section that customers can see but do not walk into, regularly has scrap material of fabrics, zippers, buttons and unfinished orders covering the floor and tables. The children in the family are often in the store during work hours, so customers can see toys blanketing the floor or hear kids screaming. A curtain separates the middle and back of the store and if you walk behind it, you will see the messiest part of the store. My grandfather turned one side of our workspace into a storage unit for his tools and woodworking. Non-working sewing machines line one of the walls and miscellaneous fabrics lay on shelves surrounding the room.
When first entering the store, you can see a desk holding business cards from other establishments in the area. They are often empty holders because no one refills them and because of the wind, the cards fly around and sometimes are scattered on the table or the floor. When you walk further into the store, the signs we print out of Microsoft Word and tape onto the counter and walls overpower you. It is used as a newsletter to let customers know any change in hours and new specials for the week. The racks that once held skirts designed and handmade by my grandmother are now empty. Once they sold all the skirts, they never restocked them. Now most people come into the store for the dry cleaning and tailoring. We have become a drop-off dry cleaner and my grandmother does alterations on clothes people bring in, rather than making more skirts. The floor is hardly ever vacuumed so it is often covered in leaves people bring in and dirt from their shoes. After my grandfather got laid-off, he started collecting junk furniture that people throw out and fixing them up. The shop has become his storefront also. We have pieces of furniture that he fixed and repainted taking up floor space in the shop. The mannequins that used to hold women's clothing, now hold outfits that were made in Africa. They have signs on them that state 100% of the sale will go back to Africa and to the people that made them. In one of the corners, we have shelves holding fabrics for sale by the yard.
Behind the counter, you can see one of the cutting tables my grandmother uses for tailoring jobs. When the orders come in, they are stacked on her cutting table, so it's covered most of the time by piles of clothes and sticky notes attached to them with instructions for tailoring. The sewing machine next to the cutting table is where most of the tailoring is done. Scrap strings and pieces of fabrics are always on the floor because she doesn't sweep after she finishes a job. When the kids in the family are in the shop, they often run in and out of the office and spread their toys all over the floor. We started stacking boxes on top of the sheet rock that forms a ceiling over our office. The boxes are full of random items that members of the family do not have space for in their own houses. The desk that holds our office computer is always covered with our mail that rarely gets opened. The kids have a mini table with matching chairs that are covered with crackers, cookies and bottles. They sometimes make it to the other tables in the shop too.
When the ceiling to floor curtain is opened, you're exposed to the messiest part of the store. When you first enter, you're not even sure where to look. Along the right side of the back part of the store, We have a row of non-working sewing machines. Some just have a few parts missing and need to be repaired. They have been sitting there for over a year and still haven't been fixed. In the middle of our back room, we have another very long cutting table that is about 15 feet long. Under that table, you can find various tools, wood pieces and broken furniture that my grandfather collected in his travels. The store also accepts donations to send to different countries so we have many random items such as clothes, couches, computers and mannequins waiting to be shipped. In the back corner, we have a small kitchen area where we have squeezed in a small refrigerator, toaster oven, and microwave. The table next to our appliances is covered with plastic utensils, sugar packets, syrups, ketchup packets and a few plates and napkins. Along the left side of the back room, several shelving units hold fabrics varying colors, prints, textures and lengths. Finding a specific one would be impossible because we do not have a system to our shelves of fabrics.
The main focus of the shop was going to be a skirt manufacturer. We soon after added a drapery business also. Then we added a drop-off dry cleaner and tailoring services. We then added furniture store, donation center, storage unit, and daycare to our store uses. The organizing system for orders is non-existant and cleaning rarely gets done. We have lost the focus of the shop and when you walk in, the store is so cluttered that you are not really sure what we are selling. Every section of the store has exploded into something that it was not supposed to be. The mess takes away from the business' original focus. The store has become a huge mess over the past year that we have been open.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Values in three generations.
In only two generations, the values between my grandparents and I have changed greatly. I am a tattooed and pierced, openly sexual, pro-choice, pro-equal rights, 19-year-old girl. My grandparents are anti-pre-marital sex, anti-gay rights, conservative, pro-life, pastors of a Pentecostal church. I believe that I am free to pierce and tattoo my body as I please but they are strongly against any type of body modification. Their religious beliefs are what motivate almost every aspect of their life and I have not yet chose a religion and am not sure I ever will. When it came time to vote for a president, my grandparents voted based on religious beliefs, whereas I voted on the best candidate for my needs. Despite our many differences, if their religious views were not as strong as they are, I don't think I would hold the positive values that they taught me, such as marriage, charity and family, so close to my heart.
When I was 15, I started to pierce my ears past the first hole. My grandfather would make comments that three holes in each ear were three too many. When I got to six holes in each ear, he told me that I had to stop piercing my ears because God created my body and it was not meant to look like that. When I pierced my eyebrow, he did not speak to me for months. On my 18th birthday, I got my first tattoo on the back of my neck. For a year and a half after that day, I hid the fact that I had purposely scarred my body for life. It is not that I was ashamed or regretted what I did; I just was trying to put-off an unavoidable lecture. One day I decided that I was tired of pulling my hair out of bun when I saw they were coming or putting a hood up on my sweater. I went to a family birthday party with my hair up. I know my grandmother saw it but she did not say anything. When my grandfather saw it a few days later, they both lectured me on their beliefs that "the body is a temple" and God created it the way he wanted to. They said that if He wanted that there on my neck, He would have put it there. Several months and six tattoos later, my grandfather would continue to tell me that it pains him every time he sees any of my tattoos.
I believe that people should be free to live their lives the way they want to. I do not believe that my way of thinking and living is the "right" way and I never push my beliefs on anyone else. My grandparents believe that every person should marry someone of the opposite sex and that homosexuality is wrong. I have tried to argue with them that asking homosexuals to change and conform to their beliefs is not a way of loving them and accepting them, they tell me I am wrong. My grandmother explained to me that God teaches you to love everyone and accept everyone as the way He created him or her. The way they do that is by welcoming them into the church and explaining to them that homosexuality is a sin and if they stop now, God will forgive them and they will go to Heaven. The way I see it, that is not acceptance at all. That is asking someone to change who he or she is and whom he or she loves. I believe that homosexuality is not a choice and not something that you can just stop doing. I believe that just as heterosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the opposite sex, homosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the same sex. I believe in freedom. I believe that people should be able to live their lives as they want to. My grandparents also believe that their way is the way everyone should be living. I am pro-choice. I could never see myself having an abortion, but I do not think it is my place or anyone else's place to tell a woman that she cannot. It is called pro-choice because it should be the individual's choice, no one else's. My grandmother argues that if she and my grandfather condoned abortion, my mother might have thought that it was okay to have one when she became pregnant with me at 17. Yes, I would not be here if she did, but I still strongly believe that she had a choice of options. If abortion were illegal and she was too scared to tell them she was pregnant, she might have tried to get one illegally and harm herself greatly or could have even died. I would not want something like that to happen to anyone, so I believe that women should have the option to have an abortion safely. All of this was a factor in voting for our Presidential candidates in November 2008. Neither of us has a lot of money and should have voted for the democratic candidate, but my grandparents voted republican because of their religious views and because they believe in pushing them on everyone else.
Although there are many differences in values between my grandparents and I, I do believe that if they're religious beliefs were not as strong as they are, I would not be the same good person I believe myself to be. They have showed me many positive ways to be a great person, starting with themselves. They have always been affectionate towards each other. There are not many couples you see at that age and after 25 years of marriage that still cuddle on the couch. They have always been completely devoted to each other and always do everything together. When they must part for religious retreats, they always call and say they miss each other. They have shown me how important it is to take marriage seriously and always try hard to make it last. They really are two of the kindest people around. They have always opened their home and their church to those who needed food, shelter, or guidance. When the phone rings in the middle of the night, they answer it and will sometimes talk for hours to someone who needs them. They have always been nice to everyone. Since I was little, I often went with them to feed or clothe the homeless. When I was in the seventh grade, they took me with them to Mexico to teach women how to sew so they could find more job opportunities. They have always taught me the importance of charity because their religion teaches kindness. If they would have not felt so strongly for it, I might not feel so strongly about helping others even without religion.
The big differences I stated are based on the way my grandparents and I act towards other people, present ourselves and what we believe in. My views are all based on my belief that I still do not know what is going to happen to me when I die. I refuse to spend my life I am living now, worrying about my next life, when there is no proof that heaven and hell really exist. My grandparents spend their lives in fear of God but also loving Him unconditionally. I know that this life is real because I am here now and I am living it. I am not going to waste it in fear of something that I do not know is real. I do believe that some good comes out of religion, such as eternal love and charity. However, I do believe that you can have those positive things in your life without religion. I believe that people created religion to make themselves feel better about dying or answer some questions as to why we're here and to create rules. However, I believe you can have those things with government creating laws and science getting closer every day to tell us some of the answers that religion has for us today.
When I was 15, I started to pierce my ears past the first hole. My grandfather would make comments that three holes in each ear were three too many. When I got to six holes in each ear, he told me that I had to stop piercing my ears because God created my body and it was not meant to look like that. When I pierced my eyebrow, he did not speak to me for months. On my 18th birthday, I got my first tattoo on the back of my neck. For a year and a half after that day, I hid the fact that I had purposely scarred my body for life. It is not that I was ashamed or regretted what I did; I just was trying to put-off an unavoidable lecture. One day I decided that I was tired of pulling my hair out of bun when I saw they were coming or putting a hood up on my sweater. I went to a family birthday party with my hair up. I know my grandmother saw it but she did not say anything. When my grandfather saw it a few days later, they both lectured me on their beliefs that "the body is a temple" and God created it the way he wanted to. They said that if He wanted that there on my neck, He would have put it there. Several months and six tattoos later, my grandfather would continue to tell me that it pains him every time he sees any of my tattoos.
I believe that people should be free to live their lives the way they want to. I do not believe that my way of thinking and living is the "right" way and I never push my beliefs on anyone else. My grandparents believe that every person should marry someone of the opposite sex and that homosexuality is wrong. I have tried to argue with them that asking homosexuals to change and conform to their beliefs is not a way of loving them and accepting them, they tell me I am wrong. My grandmother explained to me that God teaches you to love everyone and accept everyone as the way He created him or her. The way they do that is by welcoming them into the church and explaining to them that homosexuality is a sin and if they stop now, God will forgive them and they will go to Heaven. The way I see it, that is not acceptance at all. That is asking someone to change who he or she is and whom he or she loves. I believe that homosexuality is not a choice and not something that you can just stop doing. I believe that just as heterosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the opposite sex, homosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the same sex. I believe in freedom. I believe that people should be able to live their lives as they want to. My grandparents also believe that their way is the way everyone should be living. I am pro-choice. I could never see myself having an abortion, but I do not think it is my place or anyone else's place to tell a woman that she cannot. It is called pro-choice because it should be the individual's choice, no one else's. My grandmother argues that if she and my grandfather condoned abortion, my mother might have thought that it was okay to have one when she became pregnant with me at 17. Yes, I would not be here if she did, but I still strongly believe that she had a choice of options. If abortion were illegal and she was too scared to tell them she was pregnant, she might have tried to get one illegally and harm herself greatly or could have even died. I would not want something like that to happen to anyone, so I believe that women should have the option to have an abortion safely. All of this was a factor in voting for our Presidential candidates in November 2008. Neither of us has a lot of money and should have voted for the democratic candidate, but my grandparents voted republican because of their religious views and because they believe in pushing them on everyone else.
Although there are many differences in values between my grandparents and I, I do believe that if they're religious beliefs were not as strong as they are, I would not be the same good person I believe myself to be. They have showed me many positive ways to be a great person, starting with themselves. They have always been affectionate towards each other. There are not many couples you see at that age and after 25 years of marriage that still cuddle on the couch. They have always been completely devoted to each other and always do everything together. When they must part for religious retreats, they always call and say they miss each other. They have shown me how important it is to take marriage seriously and always try hard to make it last. They really are two of the kindest people around. They have always opened their home and their church to those who needed food, shelter, or guidance. When the phone rings in the middle of the night, they answer it and will sometimes talk for hours to someone who needs them. They have always been nice to everyone. Since I was little, I often went with them to feed or clothe the homeless. When I was in the seventh grade, they took me with them to Mexico to teach women how to sew so they could find more job opportunities. They have always taught me the importance of charity because their religion teaches kindness. If they would have not felt so strongly for it, I might not feel so strongly about helping others even without religion.
The big differences I stated are based on the way my grandparents and I act towards other people, present ourselves and what we believe in. My views are all based on my belief that I still do not know what is going to happen to me when I die. I refuse to spend my life I am living now, worrying about my next life, when there is no proof that heaven and hell really exist. My grandparents spend their lives in fear of God but also loving Him unconditionally. I know that this life is real because I am here now and I am living it. I am not going to waste it in fear of something that I do not know is real. I do believe that some good comes out of religion, such as eternal love and charity. However, I do believe that you can have those positive things in your life without religion. I believe that people created religion to make themselves feel better about dying or answer some questions as to why we're here and to create rules. However, I believe you can have those things with government creating laws and science getting closer every day to tell us some of the answers that religion has for us today.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Gay Marriage
I write alot of random essays. I wrote this one a while ago.
Definition of Marriage: (n) marriage, matrimony, union, spousal relationship, wedlock (the state of being a married couple voluntarily joined for life (or until divorce)). (Princeton) In the definition of marriage, where does it say that marriage is only between a man and a woman? Marriage is about love; who is to say that only a man and a woman can fall in love? My paper will fight in favor of gay marriage being legalized throughout the United States. This will prove to you why banning gay marriage is unconstitutional and against human rights. People are born homosexual and it is not a choice. Those born different from what society thinks is normal now, should not be penalized by our government. We have changed the course of our history with interracial marriage before; it is time to change it again. This issue affects many Americans and should be changed immediately. It is not fair for the government to tell the public who they can and can not fall in love with.
Many people have fought this controversial issue for years. The gay community and its supporters feel the struggle is not over. Gay marriage has not been legalized in the entire United States yet. Homosexuals will not stop the fight until they have equal rights. Many gays and lesbians believe that you are born homosexual. It is not something you can fight, but rather just a way of being born differently. Since homosexuals started coming out and showing their real sexual orientations, they were abandoned from society because of it. Many were hurt physically and emotionally. It was hard for the first people to come out and say they were gay. The gay community has come a long way since then and are now fighting for human rights. As of right now, two people of the same gender can not get married. Homosexuals and supporters are fighting for this to change.
For over 200 years, interracial marriage was banned. Americans saw it as wrong but then changed their mind. In 1967 discrimination in marriage laws was demolished in the United States. It was against the public’s human rights to restrict who can get married. Why today is it okay to discriminate according to sexual orientation while discrimination based on race is frowned upon? Discrimination in marriage by race was banned, but not by sexual orientation. If at that time, it was viewed as wrong to have discrimination in marriage laws, then why not now? Why were only certain people allowed to marry after that? People say that was a big step for marriage in our country, but it left out rights for many people. It is time to change the laws that are unfair to a large percentage of the population.
“The first point, which is often debated regarding this issue, is the origin of homosexuality. While many believe it is a "choice" made by an individual - I am of the belief that it is part of a person’s biological make-up. Virtually everything about our bodies is determined before we are born - our sexuality is no different. Sexuality and attraction are physical and chemical in nature. If you are heterosexual and believe this is a "choice" we make - I have a question for you...When did you decide to be heterosexual? What age were you? When did you decide that you would be aroused by members of the opposite sex? You probably never "made" this decision - it just evolved...when you were a pre-teen, you became fascinated with going by someone's locker or sitting next to them in the cafeteria at school, etc. These were the early origins of your sexuality, before you were aware of what true sexual intimacy would mean in your adult life. For someone who is gay or lesbian, often, just the opposite occurs - those little crushes form towards members of the same sex. It isn't wrong - it's simply different.” (moneyprograms)
The people who argue that gay and lesbian people “choose” being that way never stepped back and looked at themselves. Why would someone choose to be that way? Why would someone want to make their lives based on the fight for their rights? Why would someone choose to make their lives more difficult? Why would someone choose to be different from what is “normal” today in our society? Did heterosexuals “choose” their sexual orientation? When did our president choose his sexual orientation? When did our government choose that being straight was “right”? In American government today, all people are supposed to be equal. The gay community was not included in this, in terms of marriage.
“Some scientific studies have pointed to findings that gay men's brain anatomy is similar to heterosexual women and different from their heterosexual male counterparts… Other findings include that fingerprints of gay men match closely with those of heterosexual women, and fingerprints are formed 16 weeks after conception within the womb which could point to homosexuality being determined by genetic factors.” (Wikipedia) Though it has not been scientifically proven that homosexuality is something that people are born with, there are many similarities in homosexuals and the opposite sex. Those similarities are something that people can not choose. They are similarities in their bodies and brains. No one can “choose” what they will have when they come out of the womb.
200 years ago, enlightenment thinkers raised the radical idea that parents and the government should not have control over who married whom. The American Revolution encouraged people to engage in "the pursuit of happiness," including marrying for love. As a result of that, thinkers began to argue that same-sex love should be allowed. (Coontz) If our government started and is based on the enlightenment thinkers, then why is not every human being given the right to pursue happiness? Who’s to say that only heterosexual couples can be happily married? Every human is given the right to life, liberty and property. Homosexuals should express their right of liberty by being able to marry the one person whom they love.
“Many conservative Christians interpret these passages as stating unambiguously that all homosexual behavior is forbidden, is an abomination, and is hated by God. It does not matter whether it is in the form of casual sex with a stranger, or sex within a committed, monogamous relationship. It is all sinful. Some consider it an "ordinary" sin -- in the same league as all other incorrect behavior, like lying, cheating or stealing. Others consider it such a serious sin that it will prevent gays and lesbians from attaining Heaven after death, even if they had previously been saved.” (Religious Tolerance)
Many people in the American government base our laws on religion despite our “separation of church and state” law. They often say that the Bible does not allow homosexual behavior and that is what leads them against gay marriage. “The union of a man and woman is the most enduring human institution, honoring -- honored and encouraged in all cultures and by every religious faith…Marriage cannot be severed from its cultural, religious and natural roots without weakening the good influence of society…America is a free society, which limits the role of government in the lives of our citizens. This commitment of freedom, however, does not require the redefinition of one of our most basic social institutions. Our government should respect every person, and protect the institution of marriage” (Bush).
Clearly, our government is being run by a man who makes decisions based on his religious beliefs. He stated in his speech on February 24, 2004, that the country should respect every person by “protecting” marriage. Restricting a gay couple from getting married, is not respecting them at all. Homosexuals are citizens too. Did he forget about them? Members of the gay community should not be forgotten. The government is not allowing them to show their love for each other by getting married because of the countries religious background. The president explained how the government should not interfere with the freedom of the people but he states that protecting what he thinks marriage is, would be more important than the freedom of the people.
One of the reasons Christians and supporters of the ban of gay marriage say they should not marry is because they can not procreate. Not one human being can choose what organs they are born with. The reason for the government not allowing gays to marry should not be based on whether they can or can not procreate. If a heterosexual woman who had her uterus removed from her body and a man who became sterile after cancer want to marry, are they going to be denied of marriage license? What about the desire to have children? What if a couple decides they never want to have children? Are they as well going to be denied of marriage licenses? If our government is going to deny marriage licenses based on that, then who is going to start investigating whether a couple can or can not produce children or have the desire to, before they get married? (moneyprograms)
If our government is going to base our laws on religion, then shouldn’t atheist and people of no faith in Christianity be denied of marriage licenses? Allowing gay people to marry will not affect Christian people who want to marry or protect their own marriage, at all. No one is telling them who they can and can not marry, why don’t gays have the same rights? Heterosexual people have the right to marry for love, why not the gay couples? In this country, we have freedom of religion and everyone is granted the right to express it. People of the Christian faith have the right to express their beliefs in their marriages, why not gay people?
If churches and other religious groups feel gay marriage is wrong, they do not have to participate. No one is forcing pastors to marry homosexuals. Supporters of gay marriage just feel that they should be granted the same rights as every other loving heterosexual couple. Many homosexual couples would love to stand in front of their friends and families and show everyone how much they love their partner and how dedicated they are to each other. Heterosexual couples get to express those feelings and have the marriage license to legally prove they are committed to each other. Gay couples want to be treated the same as heterosexual couples. There is no reason for them to be rejected of that because of their sexual orientation.
People in the gay community are often shunned, isolated and rejected from society. Children who are born differently on the outside are not treated any differently than the majority of children. Children born without 10 fingers or 10 toes or even lefty’s are not isolated from our society. If being gay is something you can not choose, just as you can not choose which hand you write with, why is our government still treating them as outcasts? (moneyprograms). In history, those who were “different” from the rest of society had to fight for their equal rights. The gay community is simply doing the same.
Everyone has the right to express what they feel is right due to freedom of speech in our constitution. The people who support the ban of gay marriages have the right to express their want to keep it banned, just as supporters of gay marriage have their right to express how it should be changed. However, it is unconstitutional to let your religious beliefs run the American government. People marry for love. Homosexuals as well as heterosexuals believe that being married is an important decision and the person you marry should be the person you feel you want to spend the rest of your life with. Not even the government should be given the right to say who can and can not fall in love. Everyone should be able to spend the rest of their life committed to the person they love and letting everyone know of their relationship.
“''We must recognize that many gay and lesbian couples in New Jersey are in committed relationships and deserve the same benefits and rights as every other family in this state” –Gov. Jon S. Corzine. New Jerseys Governor believes that homosexuals can love each other and nurture children just as well as straight adults can. He signed a civil union’s bill that allows gay couples to have the same rights that straight couples have. They are entitled to inheritance, social security, immediate family hospital visits, health care, and other benefits married couples can have. (Thomson) Many gay couples are protesting that this bill is still not equal. They get all the legal benefits of a marriage but are still separate from other couples. Many are protesting “all or nothing.”
Some anti-gay marriage activists feel that homosexuals would have a high divorce rate. “More than 80% [of divorces] do so within the first 20 years.”(Wikipedia) On average, about half of the American heterosexual population is getting divorced. Who are they to say that homosexuals would do worse than that? The population will not know that unless homosexuals are granted the right to marry.
In conclusion, marriage is about love. Anyone can fall in love no matter what age, race, religion, gender, etc. Every human being deserves the same human rights as the person next to them. Discrimination should not be tolerated. America has come a long way from discrimination and has a few more steps to take. We’ve had civil rights movements in this country with African-Americans and now with homosexuals. Discrimination was demolished decades ago and now homosexuals want the same rights. The entire country wants to be heard. Those who are against gay marriage feel as if they should push their personal values on other people. Letting two gay or lesbian people marry will not effect or jeopardize their marriage at all. Heterosexuals get the same rights they have now without being effected by other people getting married. If they believe marriage is a holy union, churches are not forced to perform marriages that they do not agree with. The gay community is simply asking to show their commitment to their love partner through marriage just as heterosexual people do.
How can you help? You can show your support for the gay community and their struggle for equal rights. There are many protests for gay marriage in many cities. Get involved. Read more about the subject and keep updated on what is going on with the controversial issue. If something appalls you or makes you happier, write about it. Write to newspapers, news stations, websites, magazines, etc. Local congressmen can help the rest of the country hear your voice. If you support the gay community and want to see changes in the government, write them a letter. Show them that you, the people, support equal rights and same-sex marriage. Tell them marriage is about love, no matter what gender you are.
Definition of Marriage: (n) marriage, matrimony, union, spousal relationship, wedlock (the state of being a married couple voluntarily joined for life (or until divorce)). (Princeton) In the definition of marriage, where does it say that marriage is only between a man and a woman? Marriage is about love; who is to say that only a man and a woman can fall in love? My paper will fight in favor of gay marriage being legalized throughout the United States. This will prove to you why banning gay marriage is unconstitutional and against human rights. People are born homosexual and it is not a choice. Those born different from what society thinks is normal now, should not be penalized by our government. We have changed the course of our history with interracial marriage before; it is time to change it again. This issue affects many Americans and should be changed immediately. It is not fair for the government to tell the public who they can and can not fall in love with.
Many people have fought this controversial issue for years. The gay community and its supporters feel the struggle is not over. Gay marriage has not been legalized in the entire United States yet. Homosexuals will not stop the fight until they have equal rights. Many gays and lesbians believe that you are born homosexual. It is not something you can fight, but rather just a way of being born differently. Since homosexuals started coming out and showing their real sexual orientations, they were abandoned from society because of it. Many were hurt physically and emotionally. It was hard for the first people to come out and say they were gay. The gay community has come a long way since then and are now fighting for human rights. As of right now, two people of the same gender can not get married. Homosexuals and supporters are fighting for this to change.
For over 200 years, interracial marriage was banned. Americans saw it as wrong but then changed their mind. In 1967 discrimination in marriage laws was demolished in the United States. It was against the public’s human rights to restrict who can get married. Why today is it okay to discriminate according to sexual orientation while discrimination based on race is frowned upon? Discrimination in marriage by race was banned, but not by sexual orientation. If at that time, it was viewed as wrong to have discrimination in marriage laws, then why not now? Why were only certain people allowed to marry after that? People say that was a big step for marriage in our country, but it left out rights for many people. It is time to change the laws that are unfair to a large percentage of the population.
“The first point, which is often debated regarding this issue, is the origin of homosexuality. While many believe it is a "choice" made by an individual - I am of the belief that it is part of a person’s biological make-up. Virtually everything about our bodies is determined before we are born - our sexuality is no different. Sexuality and attraction are physical and chemical in nature. If you are heterosexual and believe this is a "choice" we make - I have a question for you...When did you decide to be heterosexual? What age were you? When did you decide that you would be aroused by members of the opposite sex? You probably never "made" this decision - it just evolved...when you were a pre-teen, you became fascinated with going by someone's locker or sitting next to them in the cafeteria at school, etc. These were the early origins of your sexuality, before you were aware of what true sexual intimacy would mean in your adult life. For someone who is gay or lesbian, often, just the opposite occurs - those little crushes form towards members of the same sex. It isn't wrong - it's simply different.” (moneyprograms)
The people who argue that gay and lesbian people “choose” being that way never stepped back and looked at themselves. Why would someone choose to be that way? Why would someone want to make their lives based on the fight for their rights? Why would someone choose to make their lives more difficult? Why would someone choose to be different from what is “normal” today in our society? Did heterosexuals “choose” their sexual orientation? When did our president choose his sexual orientation? When did our government choose that being straight was “right”? In American government today, all people are supposed to be equal. The gay community was not included in this, in terms of marriage.
“Some scientific studies have pointed to findings that gay men's brain anatomy is similar to heterosexual women and different from their heterosexual male counterparts… Other findings include that fingerprints of gay men match closely with those of heterosexual women, and fingerprints are formed 16 weeks after conception within the womb which could point to homosexuality being determined by genetic factors.” (Wikipedia) Though it has not been scientifically proven that homosexuality is something that people are born with, there are many similarities in homosexuals and the opposite sex. Those similarities are something that people can not choose. They are similarities in their bodies and brains. No one can “choose” what they will have when they come out of the womb.
200 years ago, enlightenment thinkers raised the radical idea that parents and the government should not have control over who married whom. The American Revolution encouraged people to engage in "the pursuit of happiness," including marrying for love. As a result of that, thinkers began to argue that same-sex love should be allowed. (Coontz) If our government started and is based on the enlightenment thinkers, then why is not every human being given the right to pursue happiness? Who’s to say that only heterosexual couples can be happily married? Every human is given the right to life, liberty and property. Homosexuals should express their right of liberty by being able to marry the one person whom they love.
“Many conservative Christians interpret these passages as stating unambiguously that all homosexual behavior is forbidden, is an abomination, and is hated by God. It does not matter whether it is in the form of casual sex with a stranger, or sex within a committed, monogamous relationship. It is all sinful. Some consider it an "ordinary" sin -- in the same league as all other incorrect behavior, like lying, cheating or stealing. Others consider it such a serious sin that it will prevent gays and lesbians from attaining Heaven after death, even if they had previously been saved.” (Religious Tolerance)
Many people in the American government base our laws on religion despite our “separation of church and state” law. They often say that the Bible does not allow homosexual behavior and that is what leads them against gay marriage. “The union of a man and woman is the most enduring human institution, honoring -- honored and encouraged in all cultures and by every religious faith…Marriage cannot be severed from its cultural, religious and natural roots without weakening the good influence of society…America is a free society, which limits the role of government in the lives of our citizens. This commitment of freedom, however, does not require the redefinition of one of our most basic social institutions. Our government should respect every person, and protect the institution of marriage” (Bush).
Clearly, our government is being run by a man who makes decisions based on his religious beliefs. He stated in his speech on February 24, 2004, that the country should respect every person by “protecting” marriage. Restricting a gay couple from getting married, is not respecting them at all. Homosexuals are citizens too. Did he forget about them? Members of the gay community should not be forgotten. The government is not allowing them to show their love for each other by getting married because of the countries religious background. The president explained how the government should not interfere with the freedom of the people but he states that protecting what he thinks marriage is, would be more important than the freedom of the people.
One of the reasons Christians and supporters of the ban of gay marriage say they should not marry is because they can not procreate. Not one human being can choose what organs they are born with. The reason for the government not allowing gays to marry should not be based on whether they can or can not procreate. If a heterosexual woman who had her uterus removed from her body and a man who became sterile after cancer want to marry, are they going to be denied of marriage license? What about the desire to have children? What if a couple decides they never want to have children? Are they as well going to be denied of marriage licenses? If our government is going to deny marriage licenses based on that, then who is going to start investigating whether a couple can or can not produce children or have the desire to, before they get married? (moneyprograms)
If our government is going to base our laws on religion, then shouldn’t atheist and people of no faith in Christianity be denied of marriage licenses? Allowing gay people to marry will not affect Christian people who want to marry or protect their own marriage, at all. No one is telling them who they can and can not marry, why don’t gays have the same rights? Heterosexual people have the right to marry for love, why not the gay couples? In this country, we have freedom of religion and everyone is granted the right to express it. People of the Christian faith have the right to express their beliefs in their marriages, why not gay people?
If churches and other religious groups feel gay marriage is wrong, they do not have to participate. No one is forcing pastors to marry homosexuals. Supporters of gay marriage just feel that they should be granted the same rights as every other loving heterosexual couple. Many homosexual couples would love to stand in front of their friends and families and show everyone how much they love their partner and how dedicated they are to each other. Heterosexual couples get to express those feelings and have the marriage license to legally prove they are committed to each other. Gay couples want to be treated the same as heterosexual couples. There is no reason for them to be rejected of that because of their sexual orientation.
People in the gay community are often shunned, isolated and rejected from society. Children who are born differently on the outside are not treated any differently than the majority of children. Children born without 10 fingers or 10 toes or even lefty’s are not isolated from our society. If being gay is something you can not choose, just as you can not choose which hand you write with, why is our government still treating them as outcasts? (moneyprograms). In history, those who were “different” from the rest of society had to fight for their equal rights. The gay community is simply doing the same.
Everyone has the right to express what they feel is right due to freedom of speech in our constitution. The people who support the ban of gay marriages have the right to express their want to keep it banned, just as supporters of gay marriage have their right to express how it should be changed. However, it is unconstitutional to let your religious beliefs run the American government. People marry for love. Homosexuals as well as heterosexuals believe that being married is an important decision and the person you marry should be the person you feel you want to spend the rest of your life with. Not even the government should be given the right to say who can and can not fall in love. Everyone should be able to spend the rest of their life committed to the person they love and letting everyone know of their relationship.
“''We must recognize that many gay and lesbian couples in New Jersey are in committed relationships and deserve the same benefits and rights as every other family in this state” –Gov. Jon S. Corzine. New Jerseys Governor believes that homosexuals can love each other and nurture children just as well as straight adults can. He signed a civil union’s bill that allows gay couples to have the same rights that straight couples have. They are entitled to inheritance, social security, immediate family hospital visits, health care, and other benefits married couples can have. (Thomson) Many gay couples are protesting that this bill is still not equal. They get all the legal benefits of a marriage but are still separate from other couples. Many are protesting “all or nothing.”
Some anti-gay marriage activists feel that homosexuals would have a high divorce rate. “More than 80% [of divorces] do so within the first 20 years.”(Wikipedia) On average, about half of the American heterosexual population is getting divorced. Who are they to say that homosexuals would do worse than that? The population will not know that unless homosexuals are granted the right to marry.
In conclusion, marriage is about love. Anyone can fall in love no matter what age, race, religion, gender, etc. Every human being deserves the same human rights as the person next to them. Discrimination should not be tolerated. America has come a long way from discrimination and has a few more steps to take. We’ve had civil rights movements in this country with African-Americans and now with homosexuals. Discrimination was demolished decades ago and now homosexuals want the same rights. The entire country wants to be heard. Those who are against gay marriage feel as if they should push their personal values on other people. Letting two gay or lesbian people marry will not effect or jeopardize their marriage at all. Heterosexuals get the same rights they have now without being effected by other people getting married. If they believe marriage is a holy union, churches are not forced to perform marriages that they do not agree with. The gay community is simply asking to show their commitment to their love partner through marriage just as heterosexual people do.
How can you help? You can show your support for the gay community and their struggle for equal rights. There are many protests for gay marriage in many cities. Get involved. Read more about the subject and keep updated on what is going on with the controversial issue. If something appalls you or makes you happier, write about it. Write to newspapers, news stations, websites, magazines, etc. Local congressmen can help the rest of the country hear your voice. If you support the gay community and want to see changes in the government, write them a letter. Show them that you, the people, support equal rights and same-sex marriage. Tell them marriage is about love, no matter what gender you are.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)