A little over a year ago, my grandmother and my mother opened a store together in an industrial area of Bay Shore. Before the opening of the store, it was going to be a custom skirt manufacturer for Christian women, which would be run by my grandmother and it was also going to be a headquarters for my mother's drapery business. We opened the store with racks of fashionable skirts that my grandmother designed and books of examples of my mother's upholstery jobs. Slowly the store has become highly disorganized and incredibly messy. We have collected many random items and have put them for sale in the front section of our store. The middle section that customers can see but do not walk into, regularly has scrap material of fabrics, zippers, buttons and unfinished orders covering the floor and tables. The children in the family are often in the store during work hours, so customers can see toys blanketing the floor or hear kids screaming. A curtain separates the middle and back of the store and if you walk behind it, you will see the messiest part of the store. My grandfather turned one side of our workspace into a storage unit for his tools and woodworking. Non-working sewing machines line one of the walls and miscellaneous fabrics lay on shelves surrounding the room.
When first entering the store, you can see a desk holding business cards from other establishments in the area. They are often empty holders because no one refills them and because of the wind, the cards fly around and sometimes are scattered on the table or the floor. When you walk further into the store, the signs we print out of Microsoft Word and tape onto the counter and walls overpower you. It is used as a newsletter to let customers know any change in hours and new specials for the week. The racks that once held skirts designed and handmade by my grandmother are now empty. Once they sold all the skirts, they never restocked them. Now most people come into the store for the dry cleaning and tailoring. We have become a drop-off dry cleaner and my grandmother does alterations on clothes people bring in, rather than making more skirts. The floor is hardly ever vacuumed so it is often covered in leaves people bring in and dirt from their shoes. After my grandfather got laid-off, he started collecting junk furniture that people throw out and fixing them up. The shop has become his storefront also. We have pieces of furniture that he fixed and repainted taking up floor space in the shop. The mannequins that used to hold women's clothing, now hold outfits that were made in Africa. They have signs on them that state 100% of the sale will go back to Africa and to the people that made them. In one of the corners, we have shelves holding fabrics for sale by the yard.
Behind the counter, you can see one of the cutting tables my grandmother uses for tailoring jobs. When the orders come in, they are stacked on her cutting table, so it's covered most of the time by piles of clothes and sticky notes attached to them with instructions for tailoring. The sewing machine next to the cutting table is where most of the tailoring is done. Scrap strings and pieces of fabrics are always on the floor because she doesn't sweep after she finishes a job. When the kids in the family are in the shop, they often run in and out of the office and spread their toys all over the floor. We started stacking boxes on top of the sheet rock that forms a ceiling over our office. The boxes are full of random items that members of the family do not have space for in their own houses. The desk that holds our office computer is always covered with our mail that rarely gets opened. The kids have a mini table with matching chairs that are covered with crackers, cookies and bottles. They sometimes make it to the other tables in the shop too.
When the ceiling to floor curtain is opened, you're exposed to the messiest part of the store. When you first enter, you're not even sure where to look. Along the right side of the back part of the store, We have a row of non-working sewing machines. Some just have a few parts missing and need to be repaired. They have been sitting there for over a year and still haven't been fixed. In the middle of our back room, we have another very long cutting table that is about 15 feet long. Under that table, you can find various tools, wood pieces and broken furniture that my grandfather collected in his travels. The store also accepts donations to send to different countries so we have many random items such as clothes, couches, computers and mannequins waiting to be shipped. In the back corner, we have a small kitchen area where we have squeezed in a small refrigerator, toaster oven, and microwave. The table next to our appliances is covered with plastic utensils, sugar packets, syrups, ketchup packets and a few plates and napkins. Along the left side of the back room, several shelving units hold fabrics varying colors, prints, textures and lengths. Finding a specific one would be impossible because we do not have a system to our shelves of fabrics.
The main focus of the shop was going to be a skirt manufacturer. We soon after added a drapery business also. Then we added a drop-off dry cleaner and tailoring services. We then added furniture store, donation center, storage unit, and daycare to our store uses. The organizing system for orders is non-existant and cleaning rarely gets done. We have lost the focus of the shop and when you walk in, the store is so cluttered that you are not really sure what we are selling. Every section of the store has exploded into something that it was not supposed to be. The mess takes away from the business' original focus. The store has become a huge mess over the past year that we have been open.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Values in three generations.
In only two generations, the values between my grandparents and I have changed greatly. I am a tattooed and pierced, openly sexual, pro-choice, pro-equal rights, 19-year-old girl. My grandparents are anti-pre-marital sex, anti-gay rights, conservative, pro-life, pastors of a Pentecostal church. I believe that I am free to pierce and tattoo my body as I please but they are strongly against any type of body modification. Their religious beliefs are what motivate almost every aspect of their life and I have not yet chose a religion and am not sure I ever will. When it came time to vote for a president, my grandparents voted based on religious beliefs, whereas I voted on the best candidate for my needs. Despite our many differences, if their religious views were not as strong as they are, I don't think I would hold the positive values that they taught me, such as marriage, charity and family, so close to my heart.
When I was 15, I started to pierce my ears past the first hole. My grandfather would make comments that three holes in each ear were three too many. When I got to six holes in each ear, he told me that I had to stop piercing my ears because God created my body and it was not meant to look like that. When I pierced my eyebrow, he did not speak to me for months. On my 18th birthday, I got my first tattoo on the back of my neck. For a year and a half after that day, I hid the fact that I had purposely scarred my body for life. It is not that I was ashamed or regretted what I did; I just was trying to put-off an unavoidable lecture. One day I decided that I was tired of pulling my hair out of bun when I saw they were coming or putting a hood up on my sweater. I went to a family birthday party with my hair up. I know my grandmother saw it but she did not say anything. When my grandfather saw it a few days later, they both lectured me on their beliefs that "the body is a temple" and God created it the way he wanted to. They said that if He wanted that there on my neck, He would have put it there. Several months and six tattoos later, my grandfather would continue to tell me that it pains him every time he sees any of my tattoos.
I believe that people should be free to live their lives the way they want to. I do not believe that my way of thinking and living is the "right" way and I never push my beliefs on anyone else. My grandparents believe that every person should marry someone of the opposite sex and that homosexuality is wrong. I have tried to argue with them that asking homosexuals to change and conform to their beliefs is not a way of loving them and accepting them, they tell me I am wrong. My grandmother explained to me that God teaches you to love everyone and accept everyone as the way He created him or her. The way they do that is by welcoming them into the church and explaining to them that homosexuality is a sin and if they stop now, God will forgive them and they will go to Heaven. The way I see it, that is not acceptance at all. That is asking someone to change who he or she is and whom he or she loves. I believe that homosexuality is not a choice and not something that you can just stop doing. I believe that just as heterosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the opposite sex, homosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the same sex. I believe in freedom. I believe that people should be able to live their lives as they want to. My grandparents also believe that their way is the way everyone should be living. I am pro-choice. I could never see myself having an abortion, but I do not think it is my place or anyone else's place to tell a woman that she cannot. It is called pro-choice because it should be the individual's choice, no one else's. My grandmother argues that if she and my grandfather condoned abortion, my mother might have thought that it was okay to have one when she became pregnant with me at 17. Yes, I would not be here if she did, but I still strongly believe that she had a choice of options. If abortion were illegal and she was too scared to tell them she was pregnant, she might have tried to get one illegally and harm herself greatly or could have even died. I would not want something like that to happen to anyone, so I believe that women should have the option to have an abortion safely. All of this was a factor in voting for our Presidential candidates in November 2008. Neither of us has a lot of money and should have voted for the democratic candidate, but my grandparents voted republican because of their religious views and because they believe in pushing them on everyone else.
Although there are many differences in values between my grandparents and I, I do believe that if they're religious beliefs were not as strong as they are, I would not be the same good person I believe myself to be. They have showed me many positive ways to be a great person, starting with themselves. They have always been affectionate towards each other. There are not many couples you see at that age and after 25 years of marriage that still cuddle on the couch. They have always been completely devoted to each other and always do everything together. When they must part for religious retreats, they always call and say they miss each other. They have shown me how important it is to take marriage seriously and always try hard to make it last. They really are two of the kindest people around. They have always opened their home and their church to those who needed food, shelter, or guidance. When the phone rings in the middle of the night, they answer it and will sometimes talk for hours to someone who needs them. They have always been nice to everyone. Since I was little, I often went with them to feed or clothe the homeless. When I was in the seventh grade, they took me with them to Mexico to teach women how to sew so they could find more job opportunities. They have always taught me the importance of charity because their religion teaches kindness. If they would have not felt so strongly for it, I might not feel so strongly about helping others even without religion.
The big differences I stated are based on the way my grandparents and I act towards other people, present ourselves and what we believe in. My views are all based on my belief that I still do not know what is going to happen to me when I die. I refuse to spend my life I am living now, worrying about my next life, when there is no proof that heaven and hell really exist. My grandparents spend their lives in fear of God but also loving Him unconditionally. I know that this life is real because I am here now and I am living it. I am not going to waste it in fear of something that I do not know is real. I do believe that some good comes out of religion, such as eternal love and charity. However, I do believe that you can have those positive things in your life without religion. I believe that people created religion to make themselves feel better about dying or answer some questions as to why we're here and to create rules. However, I believe you can have those things with government creating laws and science getting closer every day to tell us some of the answers that religion has for us today.
When I was 15, I started to pierce my ears past the first hole. My grandfather would make comments that three holes in each ear were three too many. When I got to six holes in each ear, he told me that I had to stop piercing my ears because God created my body and it was not meant to look like that. When I pierced my eyebrow, he did not speak to me for months. On my 18th birthday, I got my first tattoo on the back of my neck. For a year and a half after that day, I hid the fact that I had purposely scarred my body for life. It is not that I was ashamed or regretted what I did; I just was trying to put-off an unavoidable lecture. One day I decided that I was tired of pulling my hair out of bun when I saw they were coming or putting a hood up on my sweater. I went to a family birthday party with my hair up. I know my grandmother saw it but she did not say anything. When my grandfather saw it a few days later, they both lectured me on their beliefs that "the body is a temple" and God created it the way he wanted to. They said that if He wanted that there on my neck, He would have put it there. Several months and six tattoos later, my grandfather would continue to tell me that it pains him every time he sees any of my tattoos.
I believe that people should be free to live their lives the way they want to. I do not believe that my way of thinking and living is the "right" way and I never push my beliefs on anyone else. My grandparents believe that every person should marry someone of the opposite sex and that homosexuality is wrong. I have tried to argue with them that asking homosexuals to change and conform to their beliefs is not a way of loving them and accepting them, they tell me I am wrong. My grandmother explained to me that God teaches you to love everyone and accept everyone as the way He created him or her. The way they do that is by welcoming them into the church and explaining to them that homosexuality is a sin and if they stop now, God will forgive them and they will go to Heaven. The way I see it, that is not acceptance at all. That is asking someone to change who he or she is and whom he or she loves. I believe that homosexuality is not a choice and not something that you can just stop doing. I believe that just as heterosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the opposite sex, homosexuals do not choose to be attracted to the same sex. I believe in freedom. I believe that people should be able to live their lives as they want to. My grandparents also believe that their way is the way everyone should be living. I am pro-choice. I could never see myself having an abortion, but I do not think it is my place or anyone else's place to tell a woman that she cannot. It is called pro-choice because it should be the individual's choice, no one else's. My grandmother argues that if she and my grandfather condoned abortion, my mother might have thought that it was okay to have one when she became pregnant with me at 17. Yes, I would not be here if she did, but I still strongly believe that she had a choice of options. If abortion were illegal and she was too scared to tell them she was pregnant, she might have tried to get one illegally and harm herself greatly or could have even died. I would not want something like that to happen to anyone, so I believe that women should have the option to have an abortion safely. All of this was a factor in voting for our Presidential candidates in November 2008. Neither of us has a lot of money and should have voted for the democratic candidate, but my grandparents voted republican because of their religious views and because they believe in pushing them on everyone else.
Although there are many differences in values between my grandparents and I, I do believe that if they're religious beliefs were not as strong as they are, I would not be the same good person I believe myself to be. They have showed me many positive ways to be a great person, starting with themselves. They have always been affectionate towards each other. There are not many couples you see at that age and after 25 years of marriage that still cuddle on the couch. They have always been completely devoted to each other and always do everything together. When they must part for religious retreats, they always call and say they miss each other. They have shown me how important it is to take marriage seriously and always try hard to make it last. They really are two of the kindest people around. They have always opened their home and their church to those who needed food, shelter, or guidance. When the phone rings in the middle of the night, they answer it and will sometimes talk for hours to someone who needs them. They have always been nice to everyone. Since I was little, I often went with them to feed or clothe the homeless. When I was in the seventh grade, they took me with them to Mexico to teach women how to sew so they could find more job opportunities. They have always taught me the importance of charity because their religion teaches kindness. If they would have not felt so strongly for it, I might not feel so strongly about helping others even without religion.
The big differences I stated are based on the way my grandparents and I act towards other people, present ourselves and what we believe in. My views are all based on my belief that I still do not know what is going to happen to me when I die. I refuse to spend my life I am living now, worrying about my next life, when there is no proof that heaven and hell really exist. My grandparents spend their lives in fear of God but also loving Him unconditionally. I know that this life is real because I am here now and I am living it. I am not going to waste it in fear of something that I do not know is real. I do believe that some good comes out of religion, such as eternal love and charity. However, I do believe that you can have those positive things in your life without religion. I believe that people created religion to make themselves feel better about dying or answer some questions as to why we're here and to create rules. However, I believe you can have those things with government creating laws and science getting closer every day to tell us some of the answers that religion has for us today.
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